Why develop your emotional intelligence abilities?
People with higher emotional intelligence levels tend to be more resilient, handle stress better, communicate effectively and make progress in their chosen careers.People with lower abilities may suppress their emotions, which is detrimental to health. Alternatively, some people find it hard to regulate their emotions and lash out at other people.
Emotions convey information. They do not necessarily mean that we have to act. People with heightened abilities tend to harness information from emotions and wisely weave it together with their work knowledge, procedural knowledge, social intelligence and personality to help them make good decisions.
The good news is that emotional intelligence is developable. Through practice, you can improve how you communicate and connect with the most important people in your lives and gain an advantage at work.
What is emotional intelligence?
"The ability to perceive emotions, to access and generate emotions to assist thought, to understand emotions and emotional knowledge, and to reflectively regulate emotions to promote emotional and intellectual growth."
Emotions arise for many reasons. It may be that:
- someone triggers us (because they remind us of the past);
- their values do not align with our own;
- they are impeding us from attaining our goals; or
- a personality clash or a working style difference.
When this happens, we can lash out in an unhelpful way or learn techniques to pause and observe the emotions as they arise. This self-reflection makes us stronger and gives us choices.
In the self-reflection space, we can see the bigger picture and appreciate that the person in front of us is not the cause of our problems but part of the solution.
We may also realise that whilst we still feel aggrieved by the person's actions, in that brief pause, we can regulate our emotions and explain clearly and calmly why we feel upset.
Developing a self-reflection space enables us to choose the moment of action better. For example, the person in front of you may be in a place where there is no meeting of hearts and minds, and you are better off delaying the conversation to a later date in a different environment.
Your next steps for developing your emotional intelligence abilities
Emotional intelligence is a range of abilities, which can be developed through evidenced-based neuroscience coaching.
Raising your self-awareness
The Mayer, Salovey, Caruso online test (MSCEIT) measures EQ and gives a tailored report on your ability in each of the following areas:
- Recognising Emotions - ability to recognise emotions in ourselves and others as well from the environment
- Facilitating Thought - The ability to generate, use, and feel emotions in order to think, act and communicate well
- Understanding Emotions - understand why emotions arise in yourself and others. They convey information about values, goals, what's meaningful, personality differences and working style differences. Emotions often drive behaviours and decision making
- Managing Emotions - the ability to be open to feelings and to build them into your decision making process in order to learn, grow and deepen your relationships with others
Step one to develop your abilities - taking the assessment
To do the test contact, Andy Roberts. He will send you test details and login details for the test.
Step two - personalised emotional intelligence development report
One to one emotional intelligence performance coaching and leadership report
We then create a personal feedback and development report for you. The information includes practical techniques for developing your abilities at home and work.
Step three - one to one development coaching
Our initial coaching session is via Zoom or Microsft teams. In our 90 minute session, we give you feedback on your test results and explore how to apply the ideas in your home and work life to meet your professional and wellbeing goals.
Follow up one-hour coaching sessions can also be arranged. We recommend a minimum of three follow up coaching sessions.
Your emotional intelligence coach
Andy Roberts is the founder of Breathe London. He has a masters degree in applied positive psychology MAPP (UEL 2008) and is an accredited emotional intelligence coach (MSCEIT 2008).
He has worked with senior leaders worldwide, including South 32, the Inclusive Employers Group, Anerada Hess, The Australian Institute of Marine Science, James Cook University, PwC, The House of Commons, AECOM, the board of GFC in Perth and many others.
